


Doubt Creeps In

by Munnin, yakalskovich



Series: Necessary Pebbles verse [8]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: M/M, the force is with them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-09-21 18:16:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9561119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Munnin/pseuds/Munnin, https://archiveofourown.org/users/yakalskovich/pseuds/yakalskovich
Summary: Doubt that their fate is in their own hands puts a strain Bodhi and Galen's relationship.





	

There was pretty little that Galen had been allowed to keep from his former life. Sometimes, he suspected Krennic had only let him keep a few things so he'd always know what he had lost -- and what was at stake. Looking at the little white stormtrooper figure that had been Jyn's, he could never fail to remember that she was out there, and as long as Galen did as instructed, Krennic wouldn't go after her.

Galen was sitting in his room, work done, listening to some music (a luxury that officers' quarters afforded him) with the little stormtrooper in his hand. Everything had to be so big with empire -- a huge Death Star, large empty corridors, entirely superfluous dark towers, millions of people dying on a whim, entire species wiped out when it suited on of the higher-ups.

Compared to that, he himself, or Jyn, or Bodhi, really were mere pebbles in a stream. But Galen knew that a pebble, thrown right, could make dark towers fall. And that, he suspected, was what the Force was using him and his for. But it also meant that being close to him was an invitation for tragedy.

He had been greedy and selfish, grasping for his new love like a child with a new toy, and now Bodhi was already involved, and suffering, body and soul. Or was it that Bodhi had been in that stream already, and then tossed at him almost casually?

Galen didn't like either version, but that was what he had to work with.

Bodhi knocked lightly on the door, dressed in coveralls that hid any sign of the burns, a heavy poncho folded over one arm. He waited till Galen answered, not presuming anything. After the way they left things, after the way he reacted...

"Come in," Galen called. He knew it was Bodhi. Nobody else felt like that, through a closed door.

Bodhi slipped in, closing the door behind himself. He offered Galen a look that apologised as deeply as it feared. "I hope I'm not disturbing you?"

Galen put down the stormtrooper doll. "Bodhi," he said,. "Come here." He stood and held out his hand to Bodhi.

Bodhi felt his heart clench as soon as their hands touched, their fingers tangled. He had been so afraid he'd ruined everything. "Galen, I-" he moved closer to pull Galen into an embrace. Galen simply held him close, not letting their fingers untangle during the hug, and still mindful of the burn scars under the shapeless coveralls. Bodhi didn’t care about the pain. Just the fact he was holding Galen. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I freaked out. I'm not- I'm not experienced with relationship. I don't know how to-" Now the dam was broken, Bodhi found himself babbling. "I love you. I want to be with you. For as long as we can. For as long as the Force will let us."

"Bodhi." Galen took his lover's face between his hands, marvelling at the perfect curve of the narrow cheeks, the softness of the large brown eyes, the alluring full lips, the clear straightness of his nose. So beautiful, on top of everything else. "I love you so much." He leant in to kiss Bodhi's eyelids that were ever so slightly damp with unshed tears. Bodhi leant into the touch, grateful for the warmth of Galen's arms. 

Galen kissed the spot between Bodhi's eyebrows, and then the tip of his nose, and sighed gently. It felt to Bodhi like a blessing, a benediction. Like forgiveness and Bodhi was grateful. He tilted his head to kiss Galen's lips softly. "Thank you."

Galen pressed his forehead against Bodhi's and pulled him closer, still hoping to avoid the fresh burn scars. Bodhi winced softly, shaking his head in a pained half laugh. "Sorry, I'm a mess."

"And I should be more careful about your back," Galen said. "After all, the burns are there because you saved me." He dipped his head for another kiss.

Bodhi started to shrug it off but the kiss silenced him. He cupped the back of Galen's head, deepening the kiss and trying to drown out his fears. Galen kept kissing him, putting all his feeling into it instead of trying to argue. It seemed to work for both of them right in that moment. Which helped. After all, Bodhi didn’t trust himself to speak half the time. He eventually broke the kiss breathless, his eyes gleaming. Galen's eyes gleamed as well as he looked into Bodhi's: - with love, with amazement, with certainty. Bodhi's eyes held hope more than certainty but resolution. "Even if the Force has some use for us, I'm glad we found each other,” he whispered, holding Galen close.

"So am I," Galen said. "We do what we must, and then will be our own again." He followed it with another kiss.

"I'll need you to tell me, when you know what it is." Bodhi knew Galen felt the Force in a way he could, and he trusted Galen utterly. 

"I will," Galen promised. "But for now, time is ours, and we're here for ourselves, for talking and cooking and climbing and making love."

Bodhi couldn’t help but smile a little at that. "What do you feel like doing first? Or am I interrupting your work?" Last thing he wanted to do was cause any disruption that might interfere with Galen's work, and bring them undue attention.

"No, I was just thinking," Galen said. "How about we get some caf and look at maps and weather reports? Climbing isn't always possible, so we need to plan around good weather to get a chance for it."

Bodhi smiled. "I'd like that. I won't mind hiking up to the ship sometime soon. To grab a few things and assess the damage."

"Then we can go there first," Galen said. "Can you show me on a map where you came down?"

Bodhi nodded. "Pretty sure. If you've got an up to date topographical map. Shouldn't be too hard to find. It was less than three clicks out from the pad."

"Yes, I have one," Galen said. "But in this kind of territory, distance is hard to guess. We might want to go outside to the pad and just look."

"It was out of line of sight. I didn't see the pad till the last rise." Bodhi chewed his lip, thinking. "Show me the map anyway, I'll see if I can get the area close enough."

Galen got a map from a drawer and spread it on the table. It was quite detailed.

Bodhi ran his fingers over the map, his eyes half closed as he visualised the terrain. "I came in this way, so..." He frowned. "Somewhere in this area."

"In that gully, or on the ridge here?" Galen guessed. "Did you go up or down first?"

"Down." Bodhi nodded. "I landed the ship on a plateau along the ridge."

"Somewhere around here, I'd guess." Galen ran a finger over a long stretch of close lines on the map.

"Somewhere in that area, yes." Bodh nodded, leaning close to Galen to look. "We should be able to see it from this ridge here."

"Then we'll go to that ridge and look," Galen suggested. "There are a few interesting climbs on the way, but that is true for much of the planet."

"It'll be interesting to do the climb with a care, rather than rushing and falling."

"Even in a rush, a good technique is helpful," Galen said. "Lyra made a point of showing anybody she took on an expedition before she even started."

"She sounds very sensible. My technique wasn't that good." Bodhi held his hands palms up. The bacta had healed the tears on his palm but his gloves had been shredded by the time he reached the cargo pad.

"She was very sensible, especially in areas where I am not," Galen said, taking Bodhi's hands in his own and kissing the scars in his palms.

"A good balance then." Bodhi’s breath caught just a little at the kiss. "I'm afraid I can't offer you the same. I think we've proven I'm not that sensible."

"No?" Galen said smiling. "I think we've proven that you can cook, and are actually quite brave and resourceful." Still holding Bodhi's hands, he kissed the soft inside of his wrists. That got a more significant hitch, and soft blush. Bodhi had something of a thing about his wrists, the way Galen did about his throat. Strange to think they were already getting to know each other’s kinks. Noticing the reaction, Galen did it again, ghosting soft, expressive lips over delicate veins and pulse points.

Bodhi shuddered. "Galen- oh..."

"Yes?" Galen smiled up into his eyes, almost playfully, and does it again.

"Keep doing that, and I'm- oh Stars! Going to be on my knees, any second now."

"To do what?" Galen gently sucked on the soft spot at the very root of Bodhi's hand.

"Wrap my lips around you and go down on you like there's no tomorrow." Bodhi moaned.

"Why shouldn't you?" Said with lips moving softly over the wrist, and decidedly playful now.

"You should sit down." Bodhi nodded toward Galen's chair a little desperately. "That way you can keep doing that while I go down on you."

Galen sat and pulled Bodhi along, keeping both his narrow wrists in his hands. Bodhi knelt without breaking Galen's hold. Kneeling there between Galen's thighs, his lover molesting the sensitive skin of his wrists, all he needed was Galen's fly open and he'd be in heaven.

As that isn't going to happen on its own, Galen let go, however briefly, of one of Bodhi's hands. His eyes were wide, and his excitement at the situation already evident. Bodhi hurried to open Galen's pants, swift and determined. He licked his lips, already panting with desire. Once Galen was freed from his pants, Bodhi wasted no time burying his face in Galen's pale curls, licking and kissing as he offered his wrist back to Galen.

Galen took Bodhi’s wrist in his hands again and softly suckled on the warm skin over the delicate veins. Bodhi moaned warmly, his breath hot on Galen's skin, as he took Galen into his mouth. Stars, this felt right, wiping away doubt and worry and leaving him breathless with pleasure. He widened his own knees, easing the pressure a little as he took Galen into his throat.

Galen gasped, taken aback by the sudden wash of pleasure from the enveloping warmth, and easing into the way in which physical closeness was a natural expression of their connection, a continuation of their conversation with other means. "I love you," he whispered into the palm of Bodhi's hand. "You are amazing, lovely, breathtaking and incredible!" The words drove Bodhi on, warming his troubled heart just as much as Galen's touch heated his blood. He moaned around Galen, head bobbing in a hungry drive for more.

"My hungry pilot," Galen said, softly and fondly. And then, he gasped more sharply again as the pleasure intensified. "And you?" He managed to add. From his position, he couldn’t possibly reach between Bodhi's legs, and Bodhi was achingly hard, from almost the first moment Galen kissed his wrist. But he could wait. He wanted this more.

Galen looked into Bodhi's face, even as he licked softly over the soft mound beneath Bodhi’s thumb, and then gasped again even more sharply. Fumblingly, he tried to wiggle out of his shoe in order to have at least one limb that could provide some friction for Bodhi. Bodhi's wide eyes were hooded and heavy with pleasure, lips flushed as they stretch around Galen's width. He moaned at the lick, barely noticing Galen's effort in his pleasured and pleasuring trance.

Galen's movements were a much less than elegant and sure as he pushed a bare foot between Bodhi's legs to offer him that friction, due to the mounting pleasure from Bodhi's mouth; but he kept kissing and holding those narrow, angular wrists even as his breathing got more erratic. Bodhi gasped in surprise, drawing back a moment to pant Galen's name. He took Galen's cock back into his mouth, moving with renewed vigour, his hips twitching in short, rough thrusts.

"Oh yes, Bodhi," Galen gasped, keeping his foot steady and the friction going even as his moans get rougher and rougher. Bodhi's control was breaking with every twitch of his hip, rutting warmly against the pressure of Galen's foot as he choked himself in desperate bobs.

"Oh yes," Galen gasped, "I am...", and then he spilt copiously into Bodhi's mouth.

Bodhi drank him down, hunger and greedy for Galen's pleasure. He rested his head in Galen's thigh, panting. "Oh stars, Galen!"

"Bodhi." Galen's foot still twitched between Bodhi's legs as he looked down at his lover, pressing the sensitive wrists against his slightly stubbly cheek.

Bodhi whimpered warmly, his hips still twitching to every touch of his sensitive skin. "Galen, please I need-" the words died in a moan.

"Yes, anything," Galen said, reaching down to pull Bodhi up and somehow got at his flesh, to touch and stroke him towards completion. Bodhi had the suit open in record time, a hand braced in Galen's shoulder for support for his shaky legs. "Galen touch me. Stars, I'm close." He offered Galen his wrist. "Mark me, please?"

Galen pulled Bodhi close and pulled out his cock, stroking deftly; his other hand held the wrist while his lips, tongue and even teeth suckle the soft skin hard enough to bruise. Bodhi cried an oath in Jedhean, his hand tightening on Galen's shoulder as he came. It's an effort to stay upright as he spilt over Galen's fingers. Galen stroked him all the way through it, still holding the wrist; but he lifted his head to kiss Bodhi's lips that taste of himself. Bodhi panted into the kiss, his lips hot and bruised. "You make me wild, Galen." He smiled breathlessly.

"I think I like wild," Galen said, smiling into Bodhi's eyes. He lifted his hand to his lips and tasted Bodhi's seed, tongue-tip darting against his dripping fingers.

Bodhi cursed again, a rich warm word that expresses an awful lot. "Yesterday you'd never been with a man and today you have me in my knees, rutting against your leg like a Lothcat on heat."

"I took to this quickly, or rather, to you," Galen said, pulling him closer. "It just felt right."

"Feels right." Bodhi corrected, leaning in to kiss Galen slowly, tasting himself as well as Galen. "No matter why it happened, it feels right."

"And that's what it is -- no great secret mystery for the initiated only, simply that it feels so very right." Galen deepened the kiss, both affectionate and slowly sensual.

Bodhi nodded and let himself sink into the kiss, forgetting everything but kissing Galen. Galen loved him and this felt right.

"Touching you changes me," Galen said quietly into the kiss.

"How?" He believed Galen but he needed to understand.

"It gives me a spark, my sour and resigned energy is flowing again, and it makes me both hopeful and frisky. Wanton."

"I make you horny." Bodhi laughed softly, shaking his head. It's sweet how Galen made that sound poetic.

"Horny and hopeful and young," Galen said.

Bodhi stroked Galen's cheek softly, kissing him again. "And you make me feel love. A new and wonderful feeling."

Galen pulled him close and leant his face against the dark, slightly messy hair. "Don't feel sorry for me." Bodhi turned to kiss Galen's cheek. "If we are just pebbles, it because I was waiting to get there."

"Now you are here, winter is over for me," Galen said. "I thaw. Icicles are melting." He licked a still sticky finger. Sometimes, his jokes made it obvious that he'd fallen out of the habit for a long time

"Galen." Bodhi half laughed, half groans. "You're awful." He leant in to kiss Galen lovingly, licking the taste of himself off Galen's lips. Galen kissed him back, forgetting any argument in that kiss. But he still smiled into Bodhi's eyes with a sparkle he may not have seen before.

Bodhi smiled back, more at peace with himself than before. Galen soothed and settled him. "Let's get cleaned up and talk about this hike." Bodhi was more than a little keen to get out in the fresh air, however wet.

"Yes," Galen said. "I was getting weather forecasts as well so we can go when it's at least halfway habitable out there."

"This place has halfway habitable days?" He asked, not entirely joking as he pulled Galen towards the fresher. Sex in a water shower is still very high on Bodhi's list but it could wait for now. It was oddly easy how well they move around each other, Galen thought as he offered Bodhi a washcloth. Sharing the fresher with him was entirely natural.

"It does," he said. "Comparatively. A light drizzle with only occasional gusts of wind is beautiful walking weather."

Just as cooking with Galen feels natural the Bodhi. They fit. So fast it was frightening but they fit. "I think I can live with that. It'll be interesting to see the landscape when it's not a series of waterfalls." He stole a kiss and rinsed the washcloth, running damp hands through his hair to tame it.

Galen cleaned his happily exhausted prick with another washcloth while talking. "There is actually landscape there to see, and it's quite impressive," he was saying. "Stark and bare and inhumanly beautiful, even more so than Lah'mu, with which it shares some of the features."

Bodhi couldn’t help but smile at Galen's relentless ability to find beauty in even the starkest of things. "Maybe one day we both get some leave. Get off-world for a little bit. If nothing else, Eadu Prime is beautiful from orbit." Any anyone living here must miss the stars.

"We should talk about that on the hike, when we can actually see the landscape," Galen said. He smiled at Bodhi and gives a little shrug. "If there is any to look at at. Hopefully." He rinsed out his washcloth.

Bodhi caught that there was something Galen wasn’t saying. And then it hit him that Galen was more or less a prisoner here. He put the cloth down and moved to take Galen in his arms, just holding him. Galen sagged a little into the embrace, as if Bodhi's touch was taking some of the weight off his shoulders, and leant his cheek against Bodhi's hair again. Bodhi turned just enough to kiss Galen's cheek, his voice soft and low. "You're not alone. Not any more."

Galen clung to him, relieved and grateful. "Bodhi," he murmured. "My pilot."

"Your pilot." Bodhi promised, cupping Galen's cheek and drew him up to a kiss. "Yours." He wanted to say more but he sensed then and there wasn’t right to say it.

"This is the best thing in a long, long time," Galen murmured into the kiss.

Bodhi stroked his cheek, sharing small kisses and gentle touches in the small space of the fresher. He was happy to hold Galen for as long as he needed. After all, it was new and hard for both of them. Galen just clung for a long time as the reality of the support he now had again slowly sunk in. Bodhi stroked Galen's back, cupping the back of Galen's head to hold him. "I love you. And I'm with you."

"I am so glad," Galen said. "I love you, Bodhi. We'll find a way to be together." Even if it meant rearranging the galaxy a little.

"We will." Bodhi felt surer of that now. "Together." 

He kissed Galen again, meaningfully. "For now, let's conquer Eadu first."

"Right," Galen said. "Caf. And weather reports."

"One more kiss." Bodhi smiled, stealing a long, loving kiss. "Now planning."

Galen kisses him back lovingly. Okay, one kiss each. "I'll get the weather reports and you get the caf."


End file.
